Thursday, January 28, 2010

Truth # 3: We women are stupid…

Now, before everyone gangs up on me and starts screaming blasphemy I would like to say this: there are many beautiful, extremely intelligent successful women out in the world, but when it comes to men we are just plain dumb. It’s true. I know there is a lot of talk out there about how men know nothing about women but the opposite is true as well; we really know nothing about men.

Flip through almost any magazine with a majority female readership and they are full of advice on how to get a man, how to read his body language, what he says and what he actually means, etc, etc… The truth is, we love to analyse, we love to pick them apart, we love to believe that we have complete control. But we don’t. We resort to conniving methodology to get down to the heart of things. We keep an eye out on his friends lists, we dig through his pockets, we wonder where he is when he is not home in time for dinner. Why isn’t he picking up his phone? Why is he not answering his text messages? Why is he talking about getting into shape? Why is he so often away on business? Revert back to those magazines and they will all tell you these are sure signs that he is cheating. And everyone knows that every man is a cheater…

My husband doesn’t pick up his phone because he is in the midst of a lease agreement negotiation. My husband doesn’t text me back because he has put his phone on silent so as not to be disturbed whilst writing up a report due last week. My husband wants to get into shape because he’s at a heavier weight now than he has ever been. My husband will be away next week because he is meeting an international investor who is very keen on spending his money on developing the newest, most modern shopping mall in the region. Those are the reasons that I get to those questions. And I believe him.

So, you say, why does that make women stupid? Well, the fact is that we just haven’t learnt to trust our men. I admit that though I believe my husband, sometimes there’s that little annoying voice that tells me ‘go check his pockets, go see who he’s recently added on that social networking sight, go through his phone and see if there are any suspicious text messages…’ I did that once. I went through his phone and I found something that I didn’t like. It was harmless in the end, but I went through a lot of grief and a lot of stress and it was so not worth it. And I put our relationship at risk because I didn’t tell that little voice to SHUT UP!

What about intuition, you say? Well, I honestly believe that we have been programmed in such a way so as to always question, always analyse, always look beyond what has been said or done. We are driving ourselves mad by doing this. And it is so not worth it.

I think that the majority of times when a man tells us he’s been in a meeting, or met up with a friend for drinks, or has headache and doesn’t feel like sex tonight, that is what he actually means. He doesn’t mean ‘I was doing my assistant in my office,’ or ‘I was out at a strip joint getting a lap dance,’ or ‘I’m all sexed-out from the marathon of lust I subjected myself to this afternoon.’

Let’s be frank. We don’t trust men and we’re stupid for not doing so. Okay, so yes, there are some out there who lie and cheat and could give a rats ass about their women, but I don’t think the majority of them are like that. I really don’t. Now you may say that I am stupid for thinking so, and you may be right, but I’ll have a hard time agreeing with you…


  1. I agree, it's in a woman's blood to doubt a good man.
    well as you and ever women knows
    we have a little girl living in our minds doubting everything to protect ourselves from getting hurt.
    I believe it's innate in the human nature, not just in women.
    But we as people have to grow and allow our selves to get re-hurt, if necessary, and learn not to take it personally.
    Sounds crazy I know.
    A leap of fate is what's needed
    Most men are that simple as you wrote in your post...
    It's a woman's job to choice to
    a) trust
    b) or doubt
    our life partners.
    I choice a)trust until proven guilt.
    or also known as:
    "Innocent until proven guilt"
    life is short women got to learn how to exhale

  2. I didn't mean for this post to sound harsh in any sort of way, but you're right, we do have a choice so why not opt for the one that gives us less grief... and like you said, we need to learn to exhale (I like that)!